yes, you're right (blog maintenance: an open letter)

i'm really behind on posting. the problem with posting so much, each post, is that when one or two posts get held up, it's not just a matter of two mere posts being late. because each of those posts contains between thirty or forty pictures, and it's not like i just throw them up or anything.

and then there's life. or lack of. where the weeks run into one another and consist of wake, work, an hour at most with my daughter, dinner, bed. repeat. it feels like my (our) life right now is all about choices and concessions. there's only so much money so we budget. there's only so much time so we budget. and the money choices, for me, are the easier of the two to make. there may be lots of things i want, but there's little i need and i can deal with going without. occasionally i'm reminded of how crappy it can feel to be poor, but for the most part i don't need a lot of money to live, and i already own plenty of crap- i should be getting rid of stuff, not buying more.

time, on the other hand, is a real bitch. what the hell am i doing with my time? i have little creative projects that nag at me here and there. time with bebe. time with the wife. time for myself. i'd like to sit down and watch a movie from beginning to end, but two hour chunks of time don't come cheap. time costs. it costs other things one might do with that time. like sleep. for instance, i might have two hours total free time a night, but it's like buying tickets to a red sox game at the last minute. you may be able to get two tickets, but forget about sitting together. so it is with free time. fifteen minutes here, an hour there...

unless i'm willing to pay for movie time with sleep time. i stay up late to get a movie in all at once, i pay for it the next day when my ass is dragging at work. and that's only if i can stay up late enough to watch the whole thing anyway. i already fall asleep on the trains on the way home- one of these days i'm going to wake up and not know where the hell i am.

so, i may get the movie in. that's worth +10 quality of life points. but i can't concentrate at work the next day and feel miserable. that's -10 QLP. back to zero i go. in fact, that little plus/minus equation is pretty much where i'm living right now. i spend all week getting my brain sucked out at work, and all weekend putting it back in. only to spend another week getting it sucked out again. back to zero.

i don't actually assign QLP points to anything, nor do i spend any amount of time feeling sorry for myself or keeping score. but it's also hard to ignore the fact that i can put my head down, keep doing what i'm doing, and not get anywhere.

i'm not really sure where i'm going with this. it started out as an excuse and now i'm not sure what it is.

ultimately, life is good. bebe is awesome, and me and the ol' lady struggle with things here and there, but there are some really beautiful moments every day- they just (almost) never involve the internet. so what i'm saying, and i'm sure i'm saying this more to myself than any of you, is that maybe there will continue to be lots of posts, or maybe there'll be weeks of nothing. but now that i've had a chance to make this big excuse, i'm sure i'll have no problem what so ever getting near-daily posts up for the next month. life is funny.

i hate it when a blog i follow doesn't update every thirty seconds or so, so i guess i'm just feeling a little self-conscious about how erratic posts are here.

one other thing to consider is that bebe is now walking and interacting with her world in ways that are much more demanding from a parent's perspective. in the old days we could go out and i could easily manage her with one hand while holding a camera in the other. now it's two hands on the baby, and i could really use a third sometimes. it's great because she's way more interesting these days, but all that new stuff she can do means it's much harder to document all of it, for all of you. i'm not giving up, but it's worth mentioning.

so there you go. i do have a bunch of pics to post from last week/weekend, and some from this weekend that i'll get up this week. i'll probably do some tonight, instead of going to bed early. so it goes...

daddy hearts bebe hearts daddy (outtakes)

daddy hearts bebe hearts daddy

saturday morning, bebe and i started practicing for father's day. since the whole day is about the two of us, we figured we should at least be able to pretend that we enjoy each other's company...

i don't know, she's kind of growing on me...

the valley

apologies for getting this up so late- no idea why but i've been so mentally and physically run-down this week. about the only thing i've been inclined to do is sleep, and i'm even having a hard time doing that. wah wah wah. anyway, on to the latest, late, post:


whelp, i can always tell when it's getting close to summer time because bebe's mommy fills up all of our weekends with stuff to do. trips and dinner parties and get togethers- and this year beatrix will attend her first wedding! very exciting. on saturday we headed to the valley for a quick overnight to go to a pre-wedding party for our friends kate and alden. the actual wedding will be in august, and we can't wait to see them tie the big, gay knot! thanks Massachusetts! you may get a lot of things wrong (sorry shepard fairey) but you occasionally get some big things right!

our old friend, the mass pike. all throughout my life i've travelled the pike. i feel like i know every twist and turn...

our friends beth, tim, nolan, and andrew graciously put us up for the night. and fed us. and entertained us.

in return, we brought along the cutest bebe in the whole world to hang out and play.

she had some locally grown strawberries for lunch. yummy...

and for dessert, a foot inspection.
"i don't see how you can walk on these things- they're all round across the bottom!"

beatrix and tim got along like old pals.

"hey old pal!"

"oh hi, daddy! uh, um... HELP! this strange man just picked me up and made me smile and stuff! i had nothing to do with it, i swear!"

i don't buy that for a second bebe marie. but don't worry, it's perfectly okay with me. you can be social enough for the both of us :)

after lunch we headed out for some exercise and fresh air. with all of the green and wildlife, it felt like we were home in boston...

but the valley's nice, too. andrew was busy with a crowded social calender so we didn't get to hang out with him as much as we would have liked, but there's always next time! he did meet us for this walk though, and bebe was happy to see him.

when the walk was done, it was time to make a short drive to the party for our other friends, kate and alden. we hoped that beebs would catch a few zzz's on the way, but our hopes were crushed. dashed upon jagged rocks. locked inside an acme safe and pushed off the deck of a merchant vessel far off in the north atlantic to sink helplessly to the cold, dark ocean floor. she didn't sleep a wink, in other words.

but being the socialite she is, she rallied and was a big hit.

at first she was a little nervous that she wouldn't know anyone, or have anything to talk about. luckily there was a ball, and a dog, and some birds, and mommy and daddy, so she was able to use most of her words and not feel like she was boring or anything.

standing around at a party can be awkward, especially when you can't really do it in the first place. it's hard to believe this little lady is standing and on the verge of walking!

one of her favorite things to do is hold hands and stroll.

already bored.

until they brought out the watermelon, that is:

our old friend Choobie Fatback made a surprise appearance. anytime there's something messy to eat you can bet ol' Choobie will appear out of nowhere.

she likes the watermelon!

feeling a little self-conscious after polishing off fifteen or sixteen entire watermelons (that's including the rind), bebe felt like getting to work on the lawn. nothing like a little exercise to work off the meal.

bzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

...bzzzzzzzzzzzz

...bzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

...zzzzzzzzzzzzzz

oops- looks like it stalled.

and, bzzzzzzzzzzzzz

a big girl contemplates the makeshift goal posts.

on the way home we saw a bunch of oreo cows- mommy's favorite!

the next morning we were up bright and early, and nolan made us all waffles for breakfast. thanks nolan!

a book, a dog, and some friends- it doesn't get any better for bebe!

especially when you throw that tim guy back into the mix! thanks for putting us up, guys!